Everyone needs to have some kind of validation in their life. Whenever you feel insecure or you are in doubt, the best thing that you can do is to be validated. It can be hard for you to wait for someone else to validate you when you are down, but you can take responsibility for this and validate yourself.
Understanding Self-Validation
Self-validation means that you are accepting the things in your life such as the feelings and thoughts that you have. The reason behind validation is so that you can accept and understand what you are going through without having to justify it.
Validation of yourself can take the negative feelings and thoughts that you have about yourself and can change that to feelings of love.
Why Self-Validate?
When someone that you care about is upset, chances are you are kind to them, and you are loving. By self-validating yourself, you will see that you can take the best parts of yourself and then you can see them for what they are.
People often focus on negative things and self-validation will help you to turn this negative thinking into something better. You can’t save everyone else or yourself so to speak, but you can lift yourself up.
Here are some ways to self-validate:
- Talk Like a Friend
You would never put your friend down or criticize them. Talk to yourself like you would talk to a friend. Say nice things like you would tell your friend if they were feeling bad.
- Give Love
Just like you would give love to others, you have to love yourself. Say things that you would want someone that loves you to say to you.
- Be More Aware
Pay attention to how you are talking to yourself. Notice your own weaknesses and strengths and embrace these things. Be honest with yourself about what is going on inside and then feel better.
- Let Your Emotions Come
When we start to feel bad, sometimes we hide our emotions. You have to embrace your emotions and allow them to come. When you feel upset, show it, and then let it move on. Don’t hold on to negative feelings but do let them come.
- Know Your Needs
We sometimes don’t know what we need. Sometimes we just need someone to be kind to us and to treat us well. Give yourself the care that you need and when you need it.
- Celebrate Your Victories
Even when you do something small, celebrate yourself. If no one else is celebrating with you, you can do it on your own. This can build your self-esteem.
- Read
Read articles or books on building your self-esteem and your confidence. Figure out what you need to validate your life and read about it and then put it into action.
- Find Positive People
Find positive people and put them around you. They will be motivated, and this can help you to feel motivated too.
- Self-Care
Make sure that you are caring for yourself by doing activities that will make you strong. This can be taking time to have a hot bath, exercising, or eating right.
- Don’t Be Self-Pitiful
Stay away from pity parties for yourself. Know the good things that are happening in your life and embrace those things. Focus on praising instead of putting yourself down.
- Be Kind
Being kind to yourself and others will help to validate you. Just like you give kindness to others, make sure you are showing the same to yourself. You also are compassionate to others and make sure you are doing the same for you.
Final Thoughts
You need to learn to validate yourself and to be caring and understanding that you aren’t perfect. No one is perfect and this doesn’t have anything to do with your worth. You are worthy of love and compassion and when you are having a bad day, embrace these things.